Navarasas

Going through the navarasas I am particularly drawn to one emotion i.e Karuna (Compassion, Empathy, Sympathy). To think about this emotion, i feel it is the most difficult one to express. Pain unless felt from within perhaps cannot be emoted like any of the other rasas. Somehow, I am allured by the way one can express it and the way that it connects to the audience. It is an intriguing emotion, a state of mind that one can imagine but perhaps dread to go through. Somehow I am in love with this bhavam, I dont enjoy being melancholic but yes I enjoy depicting it.

One of the padams closest to my heart is Panimathi Mukhi bale, a padam that oozes melancholy, a feel of despair , pain and anguish.The nayika speaks to her best friend and an intermediary between the Lord himself and the nayika about how the Lord has forgotten her and how he does not think of her, all that in contrast to the feeling of her own. She cries her heart out, and feels the pangs of love but the Lord doesn't realise or doesn't still come to meet her.

The song is set to Ahiri ragam and the song just takes you to another world where you can only see her love for the lord and her pain and sorrow.I have performed this item many times and have received appreciation from many but each time I perform this item , I  feel I walk a step further to her , to being the Nayika  and still feel  there is so much to feel  to actually be "Her"

  Enthaho Vallabha  by Irayimman Thampi 

is a beautiful composition by Irayimman Thampi, the famous poet during Swathi Thirunal's reign. The song is set to adhi thalam  and is based on a particular nayika of the Ashta Nayikas - Virahothkhanditha.
Of the 8 nayikas in natya shahstra , Virahothkhanditha Nayika is the bold one. She is full of confidence and is quarrelsome too. She questions when she senses something amiss and will reason to get things right but will not silently suffer or let go.

This a popular song which is performed as a Padam. I really love this piece of composition because unlike other padams in Mohiniattam  where the Nayika always confides in her friend and through her conveys her state of mind to the Lord himself, here the Nayika directly confronts the Lord and asks him why is he not speaking to her, what folly has she committed and why is she subjected to loneliness.

I really relate to this portrayal of Virahothkhanditha Nayika as I believe I am a lot like her. I am bold and often question if I feel there is something amiss. Then again, in Mohiniattam I see a pattern of portrayal of women i.e. they are always the one who silently go through the pain and anguish but never once confronts. I believe this is because back in the yesteryear, women were subtle, submissive and did not raise a voice.Their husbands were treated as good as God and nothing was done without their permission. They were innocent and had a heart of gold that only knew to Love or go through sorrow. They would conclude it as their destiny if their husbands actually took to anger or left them and never returned. Such women did exist and hence in Mohiniattam this is an unsaid thing to keep in mind while depicting any Nayika. Though over the years, I see this has changed and a state like Kerala  is an evolved society, I personally have seen this gradual change in the nature and that  while women rub shoulders with men on any and every sphere, they also do not shy away or resort to destiny or ill fate but ensures they do everything to keep the equilibrium. can say I am part of this statistics today.

I realize the greatness of the poet Iraymman Thampi ,who at that era wrote about women in adorning different roles - that of a mother (Omana thingal kidavo) or one like this.

I hope more and more dancers actually perform this item as the audience today would be able to relate to this very easily.